Stress is a normal part of modern life, so how to stay calm under extreme stress is often easier said than done. Having a few tried-and-true strategies on hand can help you when you’re feeling anxious or angry.
In high-stakes situations, we panic and mess up things we usually do effortlessly. But what if your anxiety or anger takes over and you can’t calm down? Here are some practical, actionable tips to try the next time you need to relax.
Tip 1: Recognize that you are worried or angry
Pressure can trigger the body’s “fight or flight” response, an evolutionary stress management strategy that releases hormones that prepare you to fight or flee from danger. Stress triggers these hormones in modern times, but they’re not as helpful when the “danger” is giving a presentation at work rather than being confronted by a wild animal. If you frequently feel anxious or panicked, your fight or flight mode probably starts too quickly, and it’s beneficial to learn how to stay calm under extreme stress when this happens. Allow yourself to express your anxiety or anger. When you label how you’re feeling and allow yourself to describe it, your concern and anger may subside.
Tip 2: Change your focus
Leave the situation, turn around, walk out of the room, or go outside. Imagining the worst-case scenario in every case is known clinically as catastrophic thinking, and it can increase anxiety and feelings of panic.
Rather than dwelling on negative aspects or outcomes, try to think positively for a few moments. If your bathroom floods and you have to replace all floorings, this can be very stressful. However, focusing on it allows you to update and renovate, and your insurance should cover the repairs.
Maintaining a positive attitude allows your brain to avoid stress and remain calm!
Tip 3: Examine your assumptions
To avoid overthinking your situation, try shifting your focus away from your concerns and toward the task. Mindfulness can assist you in regaining a sense of calm and focusing your attention so that your anxiety does not catch you off guard. You can recognize it for what it is and choose to focus your attention elsewhere. In times of stress or overwhelm, try a nine-minute meditation to help you focus your mind. Having irrational thoughts that don’t always make sense is a part of being anxious or angry. These are frequently “worst-case scenario” thoughts. You may become trapped in the “what if” cycle, watching lots of military stress news for example, which can cause you to sabotage many aspects of your life. When you have one of these thoughts, come to a halt and ask yourself the following questions:
• Is this likely to occur?
• Is this a logical thought?
• Has anything like this ever happened to me before?
• What could go wrong? Is that something I can handle?
After you’ve finished answering the questions, it’s time to reframe your thinking. Instead of saying, “I can’t walk across that bridge,” say, “I can’t walk across that bridge.” “What if there’s an earthquake and it falls into the water?” tell yourself. “People walk across that bridge every day, and it’s never fallen into the water.”
Tip 4: Take a Deep Breath
Breathing is the most effective and fastest way to practice how to stay calm under extreme stress and how to manage stress and anxiety in your life, and when you’re anxious or angry, you tend to take quick, shallow breaths.” This exercise signals your brain, resulting in a positive feedback loop reinforcing your fight-or-flight response. Taking long, deep, calming breaths breaks the loop and allows you to relax.
Several breathing techniques can help you relax. The first is three-part breathing. Three-part breathing entails taking one deep breath and then exhaling fully while paying attention to your body.
Once you’re comfortable with deep breathing, you can change the inhalation/exhalation ratio to 1:2 (slow down your exhalation, so it’s twice as long as your inhalation).
Practice these techniques when you’re calm to know what to do when nervous.
Deep and slow breathing causes the body to stop releasing stress hormones and begin to relax. Concentrating on your breathing can also help to divert your attention away from whatever is bothering you, allowing you to focus solely on what is happening at the time.
Breathe deeply through your nose – not just into your chest but also your belly. Hold for a moment before slowly exhaling through your mouth. Take a few minutes to breathe, and you should feel much better in no time.
Tip 5: Get Enough Sleep
One of our most apparent adversaries when trying to maintain our composure under pressure is a distraction.
Performance suffers when the mind is preoccupied with worries, doubts, or fears, rather than focusing its attention on the task.
This feeling happens due to a deceptively simple reason. When we are too preoccupied with our panicked thoughts—Did I arrive too early? What if I said something I shouldn’t have? Are they fond of me? What time do I have? We cannot concentrate on more important matters, such as the speech we have memorized. We excel when choosing where we focus our attention (or where we do not focus our attention).
Everything you watch, such as worldwide response to refugee crisis, seems worse when you haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep. Insomnia is often the consequence of stress and anxiety, so you end up in a vicious cycle of not being able to sleep and then feeling worse because you haven’t gotten enough sleep.
Make sleep a priority, especially if you’re stressed out. Go to bed early and keep electronic devices out of your bedroom. The lavender essential oil can also promote feelings of calm and aid in sleep.
Tip 6: Acquaint yourself with discomfort
If you know you’re going to a high-stakes event, one of the best things you can do is lean into the difficulty rather than away from it. One way to accomplish this is to become acquainted with the sensation of pressure and learn how to deal with it. Do you need to give a presentation to your co-workers? Rather than practicing alone, practice your speech in front of a couple of friends. Do you have to complete a qualifying examination in less than an hour? Rather than studying cue cards, time yourself as you answer questions.
Another way is to have a mantra ready to use in stressful situations. Just make sure it’s one you’ll find helpful. This mantra allows the mind to shift focus and will enable you to “reality test” the situation.
When we are anxious or angry, we become hyper-focused on the source of our anxiety or anger, and rational thoughts leave our minds. These mantras allow rational thought to return and lead to a better outcome.
Tip 7: Meditate
Meditation exists to realise stress how it happens and change the brain over time, allowing you to manage your emotions better and remain calm when you need to the most.
If you think meditation is about sitting cross-legged for hours and chanting “om,” think again. Even a few minutes of sitting quietly and concentrating on your breathing is a beneficial form of meditation.
Another reason we panic is that we constantly monitor our progress during a task—we over-analyze. Unconscious charges appear to be the most vulnerable to this choking. For example, one recent US study looked at the performance of competitive golfers, for whom putting is a skill they perform so frequently that they don’t have to think about it. The study discovered that when the coach instructs golfers to consider the specific mechanics of their putting stroke, they perform worse than when they were told to hit the ball accurately. According to logic, once a skill becomes automatic, thinking about its precise mechanics interferes with your ability to perform it.
Tip 8: Take a stroll
Exercise is just as important as sleep when dealing with stress and external pressure. Movement causes the body to release feel-good hormones and aids in the clearing of the mind.
If you’re under pressure at work, even five minutes of fresh air and a change of scenery can help you to de stress at work and to feel calmer and gain a new perspective on the situation – you’ll probably realize it’s not a life or death situation anyway.
The temperature and air circulation in a room can make you feel more anxious or angry. If you’re feeling tense and the environment is hot and stuffy, you may experience a panic attack.
Remove yourself from the situation as soon as possible and go outside, even if only for a few minutes. The fresh air will help you relax, but the change of scenery may also help break up your anxious or angry thought process.
Tip 9: Surround yourself with upbeat people
You are most likely grateful for everything you have in your life; no matter how small, it can help you keep things in perspective and maintain a positive attitude.
Everyone probably has a few people in their lives who can make you feel stressed just by being around them. While it may not always be possible to exclude these people entirely from your life, when you are under stress, try to spend more time with friends and family who are helpful and cheerful and will lift you rather than drag you down.
Recent studies in the United States found that people who keep a daily gratitude journal have lower levels of cortisol – the stress hormone. It is very helpful to read a managing stress principles for health and well being book. Try spending a few minutes at the end of each day writing down five things you are grateful for and seeing how much better you feel.
Conclusion
Extreme stress before a big event is almost always unavoidable, but the trick is to know how to stay calm under extreme stress and to have less stress more fun in life. Being nervous does not guarantee that you will forget the words to your speech or embarrass yourself in front of a date. So, whether taking a few deep breaths, doing some light stretching, or making a quick phone call with someone you trust, doing something active in the final few minutes before a big event will keep you from spiraling into worry, allowing you to perform confidently.